Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
