Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize