I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
