you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
