I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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