garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He shit in the fireplace
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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