You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Randomize
