can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
