He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
