I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
