HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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