I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
