guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
All the doctor said was why
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
