You're completely useless in the revolution.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
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