dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
