physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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