I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
