how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
