Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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