honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
