there's paper in my vomit.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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