I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
