Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
The power of my boobs compel you
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
