There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize