Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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