??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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