i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
