what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
