are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
