I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
