Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
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