Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
