WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
