and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
