You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Randomize
