But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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