He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Randomize
