I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
