He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
