that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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