Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
