Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
