I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize