remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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