He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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