Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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