I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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