Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
