small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
