Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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