hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
